Here in real time is this week edition of pizza capers:

4:52 p.m.:Enter the BigPizzaChain.com store. It's the one I use when I'm too hungry to wait for the local "gourmet" pizza and I'm too tired to face a chirpy waitstaff. This day, I hadn't eaten ANYTHING! all day. Try writing/talking/tweeting about food all day, and then discover at it's 4:30 and you haven't eaten. How does that happen?
The object of my desire.
4:53 p.m.: Mr. Counter Man appears at counter. "Are you here to pick up?" Nope, I'd like to order a pizza to take-with. He glares, and mumbles something about how the staff is "slammed." At 4:50 in the afternoon!?! "It's gonna take 45 minutes, probably an hour. We're not even taking phone orders right now." That was true, as the phone had been ringing since I walked in.

4:54 p.m.: I look around at the oh-so-uncomfortable bench, already occupied by a man and his two fidgety kids, shrug and exit the store.

5:04 p.m.: I arrive home. Cranky and hungry. Greet dog. My stomach is growling very loudly at this point.

5:05p.m.: I fire up the laptop.

5:08p.m.: I'm connected.

5:10p.m.: I'm not connected. Damn you, AT&T. I must have said that out loud because the dog gives me a head tilt. Must have sounded in dog like "need to go out?"

5:12 p.m.: Connected again. BigPizzaChain.com welcomes me with "Hi, Syd." Hi, back at ya. So I hit "reorder last order" using BigPizzaChain.com's patented "quick order" system.

5:13 p.m.: BigPizzaChain.com asks me to log in. But wait, you know me. I'm Syd.

5:13:30 p.m.: I log-in.

5:14 p.m.: Nothing. It just stops.

5:14:30 p.m.: Still nothings.
I don't want to name names but here is a hint as to the identity of BigPizzaChain.com.
5:15 p.m.: I refresh page and try logging on again.

5:15:30 - 5:19 p.m: I lather, rinse, repeat. Every time I hit "enter," nothing. And just before I hurl my laptop out my fourth-floor window, I have an idea. Maybe it's not the stupid BigPizzaChain.com's website.

5:19:30 p.m.: I try an old -- and I mean really old -- password.

5:20 p.m.: BigPizzaChain.com accepts my order. Really, BigPizzaChain.com, I mean, really? You can't give a hunger-crazed person a clue that they've entered wrong password? Really? Seriously?

5:21 p.m.: BigPizzaChain.com confirms my order. "Your pizza will arrive at 5:51 p.m." Really, Mr. Counter Dude? You musta got really unslammed in 30 minutes. Really? Yes, I this point I'm talking out loud and channeling SNL-era Amy Pohler. The dog is confused.

5:22 p.m.: An email arrives confirming BigPizzaChain.com's confirmation.

5:56 p.m.: Knock knock. 34 minutes after being ordered, a pizza is cooked, delivered during rush hour and hustled up three flights of stairs. Hmmm, Mr. Counter Man, something is kinda smelly at the BigPizzaChain.com storefront. Hope it's just the anchovies.

Around the city

• The Broken Spoke is suspending its early breakfast service on Saturdays and Sundays. The restaurant now will open at 11 a.m. (instead of 9 a.m.) both days but continue serving off the brunch menu.
• In Katy, the Taco Grill has begun opening weekdays for breakfast at 7 a.m. The restaurant is making breakfast tacos, burritos and tortas stuffed with your choice of egg, ham, chorizo, potato, machacado, steak gisado and cheese.
• The Canadian-born chain Freshii is coming to Houston.
  The restaurants focus on healthy, fast food.

Around the country

• If you eat raspberries, you hate the Earth. We're just sayin'.
• California Pizza Kitchen adds whole grain pizza and tacos to its menu.
• Wendy's lures social media fans with bacon and $2,000.
• Meet the maker of the original $5 foot long.