Dear MILF and Cookies,
I am a Brit who spends much of my time in Houston and has been enjoying your site while in town.

I met a girl here a couple months ago and we hooked up a few times. It was nice, but I figured that when I went back to the UK that would be the end of it.
Stop now and no bunny gets hurt.: Fotolia
Well, she's chasing for another session and much as I could do with the pleasurable aspects of that, she seems to see it in a whole different light. I'm just enjoying the sex and, give her some credit; she's a trier and game to experiment. The problem is that afterwards she's all clingy and stares intently at me like a love-struck puppy. Then later when we've gone our separate ways I get emails with love poems in and stuff.

Obviously ,I'm a bit flattered, but I'm not after a relationship - just a good fuck. She's not a bunny boiler or anything, and on the occasions that I've bumped into her publicly she's behaved very properly, just as casual friends would. But I feel really uncomfortable because it's obvious that she'd love to have something more than just the sex. So I get a bit put off and feel that it's not right to exploit her willingness to let me screw her.

What do you think? Should I keep away and avoid her getting emotionally involved or should I just enjoy the sex and then walk away like some cold-hearted bastard?
-- Cold-Hearted Brit

Dear Cold-Hearted Brit,

So this woman really writes you poems? Hahaha! Oh, thank you for a good laugh! If you ask me, your friend is doing more damage to her self respect by writing and sending you poems than she is by having meaningless sex with an Englishman (we are all suckers for that damn accent).

In the scheme of life, this really cannot even constitute as a problem. Let’s weigh the pros and cons to determine what you should do.
Fotolia
PRO

• You are having sex
• Someone is infatuated with you
• You have a fuck buddy
• She experiments in the bedroom
• She doesn’t freak out in public
• She hasn’t gone Glenn Close on your ass

CON

• You have to read poetry
• You have to read her poetry (it was worth mentioning again)
• She is clingy
• She stares at you like a love-struck puppy

The clichés go something like this: all men are assholes and every woman is insane. It is up to the two of you to decide what levels of insanity and asshole you want to deal with. You are not exploiting her; she is putting herself in this position.

If you have made yourself very clear (which it sounds as though you have) in what your needs/desires are for this relationship, then you are not a cold-hearted bastard. You've put your cards on the table; she is a sane adult (this is an assumption, if she is not sane and/or an adult then you must end this right now and get professional help) and is in control of her actions and emotions. If she chooses to put herself in a vulnerable spot, then that is her problem, not yours.

OK, I have to get back to this poetry crap. Although hilarious, that shit kinda needs to stop, and you should tell her so. The more she writes and mulls over the loving stanzas of each poem she sends, the deeper her emotions will run for you. You are correct that it is flattering, but she is on the verge of ruining a perfectly good arrangement.

By the way, little Limey, if you send me one of her poems I will send you some kick-ass 29-95 condoms, which you can use with the bunny boiler.

Good luck and happy fucking,
MILF and Cookies