• NICE TRY, MRS. ROBOTO But I don't know that I'm buying your story about The Observer's name.
• JOEY TRIBBIANI GOES META: And the irony is Joey Tribbiani has no idea what "meta" means.
• SURPRISE! YOUNG VIEWERS LIKE THE DVRS: Older viewers are still wondering why their rabbit ears won't get that Jay Leno show they've been hearing so much about.
• OOH! A NEW J.J. ABRAMS SCRIPT? BIDDING WAR? Wait, spies? Been done. Pass.
• SUPERNATURAL CLIPS! SUPERNATURAL CLIPS! Supernatural clips!
• HOORAY, CHRISTIAN! HOORAY, FABIO! I don't even care what their shows will be about, I'll watch these two do anything. As for Bethenny Whoeverthisis, she needs to learn how to spell her name.
• AND YET, SOMEHOW, WE HAVEN'T ALL BURST INTO SHOWTUNES OR FLAMES: Despite their diabolical pink agenda. /politcalrant
• SHAKIRA. UGLY BETTY. If you care.
• FRANKLY, I DON'T KNOW THAT I WANT DON DRAPER TEACHING MY PRESCHOOLER ABOUT EMOTIONS.
  
• OR BIG BIRD TEACHING THEM POLITICS:
  

WATCH THIS

• FlashForward: Utah! 7 p.m., ABC
• Vampire Diaries: Founder's Day! 7 p.m., THE CW
• Fringe: Bombs! 8 p.m., FOX
• Supernatural: The future! 8 p.m., THE CW
• It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia: Recession! 9 p.m., F/X
• Project Runway: Kors! 9 p.m., LIFETIME
• L.A. Ink: Season finale! 9 p.m., TLC
• Wicked Attraction: Season Finale! 9 p.m., ID
• Private Practice: Season Premiere! 9 p.m, ABC